From Bryan Johnson to Batman to Jesus: We need a village, but we dream of invulnerability.
What happens when men raised on fantasies of invulnerability come into money and power?
Do you wish you had a badass group of women to discuss patriarchy with every month, you are in luck! Registration is now open for Matriarchal Blessing’s Women Circle 2026. Registration is only open for one month then will close for the rest of the year on February 24, so upgrade to founding member soon! All details can be found here.
PS Stay tuned to the end of this post for some cool free happenings this week at Matriarchal Blessing.
My husband and I are watching the show Pluribus on Apple TV right now with our daughters.
In the show, an alien life form takes over all of humanity. All humans except for 12. The rest are still alive but merge all into a peaceful, collective consciousness.
The 12 remaining people have as many hive-mind-humans-robots as they want at their disposal to do whatever they want—cook their exact favorite meals, set off huge fireworks every night, deal them winning hands in every poker game.
It’s interesting to see what the 12 choose to do with this power. It has sparked conversation in our family—what would you do with access to unlimited resources and hundreds or thousands of people to do your bidding?
And then I realized.
Oh yeah. That’s what the billionaires have now.
And what are they doing with their virtually unlimited resources and people to do their bidding?
Let’s talk about Bryan Johnson.
About a decade ago, Bryan came into a bunch of money all at once. He didn’t want to waste it on something silly, he wanted to really help out the human race.
He said, “After selling Venmo for $800 million, I traveled back in time to my 21-year old dreams of doing something impactful for the human race.”
And what did you do Bryan? Feed starving children? Save the rainforests?? Provide houses for the houseless???
Not quite. His big impact on the human race would be…… drumroll please…… for he himself to become the healthiest person on the planet. (his words).
“I wondered if we may be the first generation not to die. I put a team of 30 medical professionals together, built the world’s best health protocol, and I became the most biologically measured person in history and achieved the best biomarkers on the planet, quantitatively the healthiest person on the planet.”
Cool. Thanks Bryan.
“My ultimate goal? Don’t die.” - Bryan Johnson
In his attempt to defy death, he’s gotten plasma transfusions from his 17 year old son, spends millions to constantly bio-track his body and takes over 100 pills and supplements per day.
Out of the goodness of his heart, he created a company whose slogan is “Don’t Die.” If you pay him, you too can take dozens of Bryan’s supplements.
Thanks Bryan.
Bryan Johnson is not the first man to make a fortune and then put that fortune into not dying
Ancient Egyptian Pharaohs’ pyramids were more death-defying machines than tombs. Pharaohs were buried with live virgins and all their treasure so their high status and luxuries wouldn’t be affected by death. (average Egyptians were buried in sand pits)
The first emperor of China- Qin Shi Huang who died in 210 BCE- searched obsessively for the elixir of immortality. He funded numerous missions to uncover it. He ingested mercury pills believed to grant eternal life. Which killed him of course.
Thousands of rulers have used their wealth to commission statues, pyramids, temples or monuments in their name so that when their body died, their legacy wouldn’t. King Louis the XIV constructed the extravagant palace of Versailles while 1/10th of his subjects died from a famine in the 1690s.
Charles-Édouard Brown-Séquard, a wealthy physician in the mid 1800s, injected himself with extracts from animal testicles, claiming it restored youth, vigor, and longevity. And convinced thousands of men to do the same.
John D. Rockefeller after becoming the richest man in America became obsessed with health, routine, and longevity. He founded the Rockefeller Institute for Medical Research and lived to 97- an anomaly in the 1930s.
Bryan certainly didn’t invent the quest for immortality. He just replaced pyramids and mercury with spreadsheets and biomarkers.
Bryan is far from our only modern day King Louis, obsessed with not aging:
Sam Altman, OpenAI CEO, has sunk hundreds of millions into anti-aging drugs.
Peter Theil has donated millions to anti-aging research. He has also reportedly signed up with a cryonics provider to freeze his body after death in hopes of future revival.
Jeff Bezos has sunk billions into Altos Labs—a biotech startup focused on cellular reprogramming and rejuvenation.
Billionaire David Murdock started the California Health and Longevity Institute.
Bryan Johnson is also not the first man to become obsessed with getting jacked after getting rich.
Jeff Bezos was described by early acquaintances as a geeky, socially awkward balding man. And just look at what $240 billion can do:
Even the funny men are not safe. I would not have guessed in 2012 that comedians Kumail Nanjiani, Dax Shepard or Chris Pratt were harboring dreams of one day becoming walking creatine endorsements, but here we are.
Chris Pratt
Seven years ago, when Dax Shepard interviewed Kumail Nanjiani on his podcast, I tuned in expecting a good chuckle. But the vast majority of the interview was Dax drilling Kumail about his health regime. What supplements was he taking? What was his exact work out routine? What was he eating? Not eating?
Kamail Nanjiani
Dax was practically drooling in that interview. It was clear that though he had one of the most popular podcasts in the country at the time, what he really wanted was a superhero bod.
And sure enough, Dax soon made a similar transformation.
Dax Shepard
It’s safe to say this is a pattern. This sought-after transformation from shrimpy nerd to jacked conquer of death. From mathlete to war machine. From bullied boy to bio-mechanical messiah.
From vulnerable to invulnerable.
The Invulnerability Arc we’ll call it.
Data-loving Bryan Johnson is merely one of many putting their riches to use in pursuit of brawny immortality.
What Bryan is missing
Ironically, while Bryan Johnson claims that his health protocol includes everything you need to prolong life based on data from the most advanced scientific research available, his protocol completely ignores the most important thing thousands of studies have found that humans need most for longevity, health, happiness and survival: community.
Like this study of 2.2 million people that found that social isolation increases mortality risk by 32%.
Or this study of 300,000 that found that “having a strong social connection was associated with 50% greater odds of survival.” (50%!)
Or this one of 72,000 people that found that social integration increased your odds of living to 85 by 41%.
Or this one that found that strong social bonds leads to lower blood pressure, waist circumference and inflammation.
Bryan loves his scientific data, but neglects to include the longest and richest human health dataset of our time—the Harvard Study of Adult Development that has followed the same individuals and families for 80+ years. It has found that the biggest predictors of health and longevity are not biological at all, but social.
The Harvard study has found that the quality of one's relationships was a better predictor of how long someone would live than exercise, diet, cholesterol, or genetic family history. Strong social connections led to lower incidences of chronic diseases, slower cognitive decline, better immune function and better stress regulation.
“The people who were the most satisfied in their relationships at age 50 were the healthiest at age 80.” — Dr. Robert Waldinger, director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development
But sure. Bryan is “the healthiest person on the planet” because of his plasma and protein powder (even though he left his fiancé when she got breast cancer).
How did we get here? The origins and pervasiveness of The Invulnerability Arc
Earlier this month I wrote a post called “We need a village. We dream of a man” in which we discussed the Great Savior pitched to women, you know that thing that will provide safety, status, financial security, health and happiness? For women, it’s being chosen by a man.
We concluded that no Sandra Bullock movie would exist if she had community, but instead of dreaming of community, she looks to a man to solve all of her problems and provide her salvation.
What is the Great Savior pitched to men that will provide them safety, status, security, health and happiness?
Invulnerability.
The invulnerability arc shows up in just about every myth, story and hero we have for boys—be they modern or ancient, religious or secular.
The story goes like this: once upon a time there was a weak, shrimpy boy, who eventually through pain and violence is transformed into a fortress of muscle and power. Now no one makes fun of him. Now he is a hero.
CAPTAIN AMERICA
A shrimpy nerd wants to fight in the army, but can’t. He’s too shrimpy. He gets beat up. Eventually he fights in some wars, kills a bunch of people and becomes savior of America.
HARRY POTTER
A shrimpy nerdy orphan is shunned by his family, forced to live in the hall closet and be beat up by his cousin. Eventually he fights in some battles and after securing The Deathly Hallows, becomes the master of death and savior of the world.
HERCULES
A shrimpy half god is made fun of and shunned both on earth and by the gods. He proves himself a hero by killing all the monsters and becoming immortal.
JOSEPH FROM THE BIBLE
A shrimpy, unpopular boy gets mocked and shunned by all his brothers. Literally sold into slavery by them. Eventually he becomes the Vizier of Egypt.
MARIO
A shrimpy plumber fights all the bad guys, saves the princess and becomes hero of the castle.
BATMAN
A shrimpy little boy is left all alone when his parents die. Grows up to fight a lot. Kills some people. Becomes impenetrable vigilante.
JON SNOW
A shrimpy bastard child is shunned by his village and family, cast off to the fringe of society, fights a bunch, kills a bunch of people, and eventually is called upon to be king of the land.
JESUS/GOD
Son of a carpenter, whose divinity is unrecognized, mocked, shunned and killed by his own people. Then, literally defeats death, becomes a God to rule and reign forevermore as the conquer of death.
And God the Father—the Abrahamic God of Islam, Christianity and Judaism is the ultimate invulnerable. Omniscient. All powerful. All knowing. He needs no one, relies on no one. He has no community of gods. He exists in perfect self-sufficient power. A forever lone, untouchable monarch.
This is the God that billions—both now and throughout history— are trying to emulate. Taught they are made in his image. That they should be like him in every way.
If boys are raised worshipping a God who needs no one, answers to no one and cannot be wounded, it should not surprise us that when they gain power, they try to become Him.1
The pattern all these heroes have in common?
The invulnerability arc.
It goes like this:
WEAKNESS AND VULNERABILITY —> VIOLENCE AND WAR —> INVULNERABILITY AND POWER.
These motivational posts depicting modern day invulnerability arcs are everywhere:
Is it such a mystery that so many men use their riches to become invulnerable? When they’ve been fed that fantasy thousands of times in thousands of ways?
Bummer for them, bummer for us that similar to our discussion about the female savior—there’s a big fat missing piece of the puzzle and it just so happens to be the #1 factor in human health and happiness: community.
To be happy we need community. To be healthy we need community.
And in community? Invulnerability isn’t a necessity, it’s a liability.
Vulnerability is a very important ingredient to build strong social ties. Last week in our community building class, Graham encouraged vulnerability over and over and over. It’s one of his primary pieces of advice—to make friends you have to be vulnerable.
To make any relationship last you have to be vulnerable.
And if you want to live a long time, you have to have relationships.
We are not in need of any more warriors, but we are in desperate need of more villagers.
In the show Pluribus, the main character is not a people person. She is happy to be left completely alone thank you very much.
She will cook for herself, entertain herself and keep herself company.
But 48 days in? She is BEGGING those “humans” to come back.
She sobs when she gets to hug one again.
She learns the lesson so very many have learned before her—you can have all the resources in the world, but if you don’t have people, you have nothing.
How many times and in how many ways must we learn this lesson?
What atrocities could be avoided if we dreamed in community instead of self optimization and invulnerability?
And if you want to talk more about community- about how its the solution to our problems and how to actually do it, boy oh boy do I have some treats for you this week!
I’m doing not one, but TWO Substack LIVES with some amazing, inspiring community builders.
And they are both on Wednesday of this week.
On Wed Feb 4 at 9:00am PST, I will be chatting with Garrett Bucks—he writes The White Pages about how community is our only hope and hosts free community-building classes called Barnraisers (which I highly recommend). We are going to be talking about how patriarchy affects community building, how to do it anyway and better solutions to the male loneliness epidemic than finding a wife :) Join us on Wednesday here.
On Wed Feb 4 at 2:00pm PST, I will be chatting with Lisa Sibbett —she writes The Auntie Bulletin about kinship and community for those who are helping to raise other people’s children. I’m so inspired by her and her non-conventional community building. You guys are going to love her. We’re going to talk about how to think outside of society’s conventions when it comes to kinship and tips and tricks for forging it. Join us here.
Contrast this with divine heroes of the Iroquois and other Indigenous traditions such as The Sky Woman who falls from the sky and many animals work together to try to break her fall. The earth is placed on Turtle’s back. Sky Woman lands gently, gives thanks, dances and spreads soil with her hands. As she moves the earth grows. Power comes not from omniscience but from mutual dependence.
I know it’s an extroverted world, full of people who feed on the energy of others. For them, community is life. For introverts, who renew their energy through alone time, I suppose community may be one or two good friends. So many articles on the need for community don’t seem to consider us.
"If boys are raised worshipping a God who needs no one, answers to no one and cannot be wounded, it should not surprise us that when they gain power, they try to become Him."🔥🔥🔥